Every sister will be at a different stage with her mother’s wound. For some, it may be a feeling of deep anger and resentment towards your mother. That is the first layer of awareness. You are recalling the wound at its core.
For others, it is a feeling of deep sadness and grief. A feeling of loosing the mother they wish they had or wanted. This is the second layer of awareness. You are honoring the loss of what could have been. The longing and waiting for the mother you always wanted. Realizing that emptiness inside is waiting for love to fill and heal your heart.
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After much reflection and inner work, you reach a level of compassion for your mother. Knowing that she was also wounded and unaware of her traumas and suffering she held. This is the third layer of awareness. You are entering into an amazing shift. You actually see your mother as another female or child who has deep wounds herself.
You see your mother with love and compassion. Knowing she needed so much more love in her life and didn’t receive it herself. You realize she raised you the best that she could-with the minimal example she was given by her mother.
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After much inner work, you reach the fourth layer of healing mother wounds with a feeling of internal peace. This is peace of what is. Accepting the current situation without trying to change or “fix” your mother. Allowing what is. Feeling the type of peace that makes you feel stable and confident in yourself as a woman and mother yourself now.
No longer looking for the approval of your mother. Rather, honoring her for who she is and what she is capable of offering your relationship. Internal peace is a layer that takes daily practice and self-love.